6:30 AM: Waiting for the chimney starter.
7:20 AM: the clod of meat hits the smoker.
8:30 AM: bacon-weave mat complete.
9:20 AM: meat torpedo assembled. Not visible: secret bacon innards.
9:25 AM: me(a)teorization in progress.
10:30 AM: meat.
12:15 PM: 162 °F and nowhere near done.
1:40 PM: latent fat in the burnt ends finally renders. Tasty, tasty fat.
2:45 PM: drooooooooooooooooool. And we don't get to eat til 5.